somewhere in the middle 3

…i got out of bed because the air was feeling too thin
and i could feel the remnants of screams racing up my throat
so i left the room
walked through the closing hallway
past the white kitchen
that you used to paint bright with your smile
and out into the morning
i tried standing
but my feelings weighed too heavy
so i laid there
in dew stained grass
and watched the sky
tried not to spot the shapes in the clouds because somewhere in the middle you did that too
instead i laid there
and thought
wondered how we got to this point
where it all started
when feelings started to diminish
and become too great
all at the same time
wondered how my love could be so great
that fear of losing you
became fear of losing me
wondered how my love could be so great
that dreams of me and you
erased dreams of mine
wondered how my love could be so great
that in taking care of you
i stopped looking after myself
that in taking care of you
i stopped taking care of me
i
wondered
how my love could be so strong
that in taking care of you
i stopped loving me
that your dreams became my beliefs
but you filled all my voids
so i stayed
and tried to make it seem
as if it was okay…

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